Tuesday, February 23, 2010

It's about to be a....

Dear Texas,
Is it safe? I feel like the birthrate and engagement rate up in that hood dikwa very very exponential oh. I can't stalk around without seeing new mommies and fiances popping up. Don't get me wrong..i love love..love is a beautiful thing and I LOVE kids!!! Am just observing. Do these people know something the rest of us don't? Or maybe it's just that age aye?

Dear Girl-who-caught-herself-trying-to-mess-with-me..aka roommate from hell,
*laughs quietly to self while shaking her head*...I mean see me see trouble o! You spilled coffee on the carpet..ok...accidents happen. Didn't clean it for weeks...ok. Your mom is supposed to have KABOOM at home straight from AsSeenOnTv. Great. Your ass went home and forgot to bring it...that's cool too.
Me: "maybe you should try regular detergent, it works fine too"
Dumbass: "yeah..my mom will just get the cleaner..what is the big deal"
Me: the big deal is it's been there 3 weeks and you did not bring the cleaner like you said and i have to look at it
Dumbass: Well that's too bad i'm not cleaning it before the exam *slams door*
Me: *sees red*

Heeeeeeeeee My GOODNESS! a whole me? seriously...seriously? This chick...I dont even know how i held my tongue. And the bad thing...bad for her..is i dont even LIKE the chick!! This chick doesn't know that I'm up on my bad girls club ish and i will readily melt butter into her egg whites/olive oil into her fat free dressing/sugar in her oatmeal/lock her bathroom and room from the inside/turn of all the electricity in her portion of the house/change the wi-fi password/put beef stock in her food (she's indian).
She should try me again!

I know i should be on some WWJD stuff but mehn..something has to be done.

Dear Michelle Tratchenberg,
LMAO!! this was actually good!! made my day. No more buffy's lil sister huh!



Myne Whitman said...

The plenty engagements and babies must be the age and you're noticing. Thousands of people get engaged and even more babies are born each day.

Your threats to your roomie made me laugh. Abeg pity her sha.

Myne Whitman said...

And I am first!!!!!!!

doll said...

i am with you on this..funny how it seems to be in my face now..maybe cuz am gonna be 24 this year..the age every girl dreams she will settle

Suru said...

Here am in the library trying to stop myself from laughing out loud. This is hilarious and got me thinking of some things I can do to my roommates

Femme Lounge said...

lol! i bet she will get it done fast if knows you are not going the wwjd route.