Yayyy it's friday!!!
and Yay!!! I'm a good mood because God is wonderful and faithful and even though my mustard seed faith wavers...He's still faithful. I'm sure He must shake his head at me when I'm being chicken little!
Today is my dad's birthday!...yay!! My dad is awesome and I love him and the sacrifices that he and my momma made for their kids!! I just hope I make them proud! :)
So..yesterday/this week i was all ready to blog about my version of evolution (cuz i don't believe in the current version) and how it applies to interracial dating and marriage..but then SOMEONE!!! told me that I'd gone off the deep end with my stereotypes cuz I've been in isolation...I still think i have something sha..but let me sleep on that a little bit.
I've realized...even though i thought i knew this a while back..than music just makes me happy. I used to love studying to music but then i was scared that i wouldn't be able to remember stuff on exams cuz i wouldn't be allowed to have headphones on..but I can't just not listen to music all together..so now i just listen when I'm walking.
Top 10 on steady repeat (yes they are all old)
1. MI - illegal music - track 2-- the one that goes "i can paint a picture with a pen"
2. MI - illegal music - Gbono fe li freestyle...i love MI!!
3. Lady Gaga - Just Dance...that's the only Lady Gaga song i have on my ipod but it puts me in such a good mood..i ALWAYS dance..regardless of where I am.
4. Good girls go bad! - Starship cobra
5. Superhuman - Chris Brown f. Keri Hilson
6. Maino - All the above
7. Ego- Beyonce...i dunno..i get in these beyonce moods..I'm so going to learn that dance..just cuz i wanna
8. Nickelback - I'd come for you
9. Buy you a drink -the remix with Trey Songz...
10. Redeemer - Nicole C. Mullen...i love the part where she says "Because He lives I can face tomorrow"
Redeemer
Heb. goel; i.e., one charged with the duty of restoring the rights of another and avenging his wrongs (Lev. 25:48, 49; Num. 5:8; Ruth 4:1; Job 19:25; Ps. 19:14; 78:35, etc.). This title is peculiarly applied to Christ. He redeems us from all evil by the payment of a ransom (q.v.). (See REDEMPTION.)
deep stuvvs!
11. Use somebody-Kings of Leon..but it's not on my ipod
@Mgbeks..i was gonna comment on ya blog about the whole running thing..I dunno about no marathon status type running yet (been scared ever since some 23yr old collapsed and later died running the Baltimore marathon) but...i would love to run the 5k someday. There's this couch to 5k running training type thing that I've been doing..it helps you stay fit and it trains you to pace yourself while running..you should checkirrout if you are interested. Ahem..I'm on week 3..I've been on week 3 for like 2 weeks *blush* don't judge me!! this girl is busy and thangs!!
Errrmmm......hmmm...it's getting cold!! soooo not cool.
Enjoy the weekend folks...stay warm
Friday, October 16, 2009
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Standing Up for what you believe in...
Shall we address why i'm still up at freaking 2:27am even though I have class tomorrow and was twenty minutes late to class yesterday cuz i slept late? Let's not!
Ok...so...CBS has the monopoly on the best reality shows - Amazing Race, Big Brother and Survivor.
I'm not going to go into details but I just watched 3 episodes of Survivor ONDEMAND and can I just say it revived my dwindling hope for black America?
This random dude Ben was calling this black chick Jasmine ghetto trash cuz she was accusing him of bodyslamming her in a challenge. Ben (a bar manager) later called her a bitch and said that she should go eat ketchup sandwiches and drink koolaid.
Enter our hero Jaison...at first i thought he was a proper naija boy..but then he spoke and i was like..."awww man..nah he ain't but he's still cute tho..sans the two toned southern exposure"....
All this while...*Ben and Jaison are on the same team...Jasmine is on the other team..she was visiting their camp for the day*
All this while, Jaison was just quiet, observing..and I'm like "ok i know this is a game..but can my black man please stand up for me?"...(well not me but you get).
So sha...that episode goes by and Ben is still there..Jaison still aint said jack.
Next episode...Ben is even more obnoxious and annoying..or maybe i just really dont like the guy more...and Jaison is like.."dude made some racial comments"..."dude's gotta go!!"
Errbody else including Russell (who is another case) was like "nah men..let's take out a girl and leave him for next time".Jaison is like..."dude's gotta go!"
So they all go to tribal council where they vote...and after some back and forth between Ben and Jaison...Jaison finally gives this speech..speech to rival any and all of Obama and MLK's speeches put together (ok...i'm exaggerating). But seriously...it brought tears to my eyes. I said a special prayer for his parents for raising him right!
He said:
"I just have to draw a line in the sand. And I have to say that there is no 1 million dollars that is worth me sitting up with him anymore. I mean, I sat here and watched him scream at Yasmin at our camp, and over here, saying incredible things. So is there a way to patch this rift? I don't think so. But I'm not going to sit in camp and listen to this guy. I'm just not.You should have some sensitivity to history. And historically when certain comments are made and directed toward certain people it is because of race. If what you're telling me what you said had no racial context, then maybe what Yasmin said is right and you are ignorant.”- Jaison
*guess her name is Yasmin not Jasmine :D
Chineke!! I wanted to applaud!! I was filled with this renewed sense of hope..and pride. That's what we need. More men to stand up for what they believe in. Was Yasmin wrong?..ABSOFREAKINGLUTELY....but that is not the point..let her wallow in her own ignorance. Years from now she will look back and regret her actions..but Jaison never ever will.
So even if RIP Black in America is right and the Jaisons of the world will go on to marry white women..while the Yasmins of the world stay picking no good men and being loud and nonsubmissive...that's ok too. Maybe it's natural selection..cuz i know that regardless of who Jaison marries (as I book my UHAUL to relocate to chitown)..he will instill in his progeny that idea of believing in something and standing up for it!! I hope. In short Jaison is on my prayer list!
About Jaison...Jaison Robinson is a 28 year old law student from Chicago. Undergrad from Stanford. US National Water Polo team :), Loves physical activities *ahem*...plays the piano and the cello...uh...did i mention he was named Mr Califorina by Cosmo in 2006? Oh i didnt? Did i mention that i was relocating to the Chi? LOL!! Trynna find a cuter picture than what's on CBS.com
Ok...so...CBS has the monopoly on the best reality shows - Amazing Race, Big Brother and Survivor.
I'm not going to go into details but I just watched 3 episodes of Survivor ONDEMAND and can I just say it revived my dwindling hope for black America?
This random dude Ben was calling this black chick Jasmine ghetto trash cuz she was accusing him of bodyslamming her in a challenge. Ben (a bar manager) later called her a bitch and said that she should go eat ketchup sandwiches and drink koolaid.
Enter our hero Jaison...at first i thought he was a proper naija boy..but then he spoke and i was like..."awww man..nah he ain't but he's still cute tho..sans the two toned southern exposure"....
All this while...*Ben and Jaison are on the same team...Jasmine is on the other team..she was visiting their camp for the day*
All this while, Jaison was just quiet, observing..and I'm like "ok i know this is a game..but can my black man please stand up for me?"...(well not me but you get).
So sha...that episode goes by and Ben is still there..Jaison still aint said jack.
Next episode...Ben is even more obnoxious and annoying..or maybe i just really dont like the guy more...and Jaison is like.."dude made some racial comments"..."dude's gotta go!!"
Errbody else including Russell (who is another case) was like "nah men..let's take out a girl and leave him for next time".Jaison is like..."dude's gotta go!"
So they all go to tribal council where they vote...and after some back and forth between Ben and Jaison...Jaison finally gives this speech..speech to rival any and all of Obama and MLK's speeches put together (ok...i'm exaggerating). But seriously...it brought tears to my eyes. I said a special prayer for his parents for raising him right!
He said:
"I just have to draw a line in the sand. And I have to say that there is no 1 million dollars that is worth me sitting up with him anymore. I mean, I sat here and watched him scream at Yasmin at our camp, and over here, saying incredible things. So is there a way to patch this rift? I don't think so. But I'm not going to sit in camp and listen to this guy. I'm just not.You should have some sensitivity to history. And historically when certain comments are made and directed toward certain people it is because of race. If what you're telling me what you said had no racial context, then maybe what Yasmin said is right and you are ignorant.”- Jaison
*guess her name is Yasmin not Jasmine :D
Chineke!! I wanted to applaud!! I was filled with this renewed sense of hope..and pride. That's what we need. More men to stand up for what they believe in. Was Yasmin wrong?..ABSOFREAKINGLUTELY....but that is not the point..let her wallow in her own ignorance. Years from now she will look back and regret her actions..but Jaison never ever will.
So even if RIP Black in America is right and the Jaisons of the world will go on to marry white women..while the Yasmins of the world stay picking no good men and being loud and nonsubmissive...that's ok too. Maybe it's natural selection..cuz i know that regardless of who Jaison marries (as I book my UHAUL to relocate to chitown)..he will instill in his progeny that idea of believing in something and standing up for it!! I hope. In short Jaison is on my prayer list!
About Jaison...Jaison Robinson is a 28 year old law student from Chicago. Undergrad from Stanford. US National Water Polo team :), Loves physical activities *ahem*...plays the piano and the cello...uh...did i mention he was named Mr Califorina by Cosmo in 2006? Oh i didnt? Did i mention that i was relocating to the Chi? LOL!! Trynna find a cuter picture than what's on CBS.com
Monday, October 5, 2009
Life...Love and the Pursuit of Happiness..
So this post from taynementy got me thinking before..then i put my thoughts on hold until today... These are not long thoughts...just semi-complete..sometimes incomplete sentences..about those three things in the title....
On Love..went to a friend's wedding this past whirlwind weekend..and it was nice catching up with the peeps...and chilling with my neph!!!Every time i see him i want to relocate so i can see him everyday! :( He's barrels of fun!!! Sha sha...the wedding was interesting. The bride was beautiful..her wedding dress was gorgy!! The only lil damper was a lil speech given about the cake before the "first feeding" and how it was supposed to be bringing us...uncouth lil folks a slice of culture by including a leaf covered statue of the Eiffel Tower...end verbal diarrhea....Oh yes! yo girl caught the bouquet!!! LMAO...teeeheee....it was quite comical really...especially when my mom came over to hug me like i had accomplished some feat..when nobody else really wanted to catch it...single ladies be fronting sha!! Moms followed it up by asking me when i was getting married...to which i promptly replied:"two years"...:D. Trust my pops to act like nothing happened!
On the pursuit of happiness...you know what makes me happy? ..every morning at 7am...my alarm is set to 860AM radio..so i wake up to Dr. Robert Cook's "walk with the King"...i thought it was just a 15 minute morning devotional..but apparently I've been missing like 40 minutes of it! Ha!..anyway..i think those last 15 minutes are when he summarizes. I love it because it just puts me in the right mind frame for the day. Instead of rushing to get ready like my roommate (who i beat to class everyday anyway!!)...i get those 15 minutes to relax and reflect on the blessings of the day before and the challenges of the day...
On Life..so the big deal in school today is about one of the 2009 Nobel Laureates for Medicine and Physiology..Carol Greider . They discovered the enzyme telomerase and i had typed stuff about it but it somehow got deleted and i dont feel like typing it again...it has something to do with cancer and aging...
you know who might have waaay more telomerase than normal people? George Hamilton..like this dude doesn't seem to age!! Has anyone sequenced his DNA? he could be the source of several cures..i tell you..look at his pictures from the '50's, 80's and today...this dude is 70!...then again maybe it's the tanning...and the botox..but even before botox men...!
you know who might have waaay more telomerase than normal people? George Hamilton..like this dude doesn't seem to age!! Has anyone sequenced his DNA? he could be the source of several cures..i tell you..look at his pictures from the '50's, 80's and today...this dude is 70!...then again maybe it's the tanning...and the botox..but even before botox men...!
Anyhoo...Greider is like 48 now with a husband and 2 kids......they made this discovery when she was 23 and in her first year of grad. school....So when i heard..my first reaction was like...good for her..followed closely by a second which was...um..yo girl is 3 years late on the Nobel-worthy discovery tip..but i have twenty two years before i hit that 48 mark!
And then i thought...I mean i would like my work to be meaningful and helpful to mankind..but seriously that's not what gets me up in the morning..I just really want to do the best I can in that one day and make it through the day onto the next. And i want to love what i do. So I'm praying for God's vision and wisdom on that...maybe if i didn't watch so much TV..I'd have more time for other stuff :D
On Love..went to a friend's wedding this past whirlwind weekend..and it was nice catching up with the peeps...and chilling with my neph!!!Every time i see him i want to relocate so i can see him everyday! :( He's barrels of fun!!! Sha sha...the wedding was interesting. The bride was beautiful..her wedding dress was gorgy!! The only lil damper was a lil speech given about the cake before the "first feeding" and how it was supposed to be bringing us...uncouth lil folks a slice of culture by including a leaf covered statue of the Eiffel Tower...end verbal diarrhea....Oh yes! yo girl caught the bouquet!!! LMAO...teeeheee....it was quite comical really...especially when my mom came over to hug me like i had accomplished some feat..when nobody else really wanted to catch it...single ladies be fronting sha!! Moms followed it up by asking me when i was getting married...to which i promptly replied:"two years"...:D. Trust my pops to act like nothing happened!
Sooooo not the point of this paragraph sha.....point was...I know we are all at that age and everythang where...our career goals might be looking like it's getting somewhere...and we are done partying and bs-ing...and therefore...feel the need to jump the broom...but my prayer is that everyone who wants to get married finds the right person to jump the right broom with..not cuz it's the "logical" next step but because that's who they want to spend their happily ever after with. Amen
On the pursuit of happiness...you know what makes me happy? ..every morning at 7am...my alarm is set to 860AM radio..so i wake up to Dr. Robert Cook's "walk with the King"...i thought it was just a 15 minute morning devotional..but apparently I've been missing like 40 minutes of it! Ha!..anyway..i think those last 15 minutes are when he summarizes. I love it because it just puts me in the right mind frame for the day. Instead of rushing to get ready like my roommate (who i beat to class everyday anyway!!)...i get those 15 minutes to relax and reflect on the blessings of the day before and the challenges of the day...
My neph..makes me happy...
My friends and family being healthy and happy makes me happy...
Resto makes me happy...
School....ha! not so much...but life after school definitely makes me happy...
erm...glad to see that some ppl had nice weekends..thanks for the prayers on Friday....I'm sure they were answered.
@Myne..thanks for visiting and commenting!!!
mini rant!!....Guys..you might think you don't have an expiration date..but y'all do...looking like old uncles at the club...if you like don't go settle down and find a wife...when younger girls see you what they're really thinking is "EWWWW..why is this old guy who looks like my uncle trying to holla". And for the love of 1997...please stop posing with fake gang signs and the peace sign..maybe it's just me but the hell!!...stop it!! guys and girls...stop it now!
Now that i have properly wasted 2 hours of my life typing and browsing...i must now go do what I'm supposed to be doing. And i was looking forward to watching Mulan today! :(
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Tumbleweed....Echo...Hellooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!
Soooooo..I was about to throw a temper tantrum complete with rolling on the floor, kicking and screaming because ppl have not been updating their blogs!! I mean what the H? Like..i need time wasting things to do but every time i go the blogs..i've already read the most recent update!!
Then i remembered that I hadn't updated in a minute either...teehee! :D Well at least i'm not as bad as some other ppl that haven't updated in 6months (*ahem HauteFaces!! :p)
Not that I have much to update about..these days just seem to all roll into one another...and i do the exact same thing everyday...bleurgh!!...and I dont even get to watch TV.
So I've been praying for serious help..and God has been giving it...but I really need to work on the fact that I just might be really really xenophobic (with the foreigners being everyone that is not me..or related to me..or a friend)...end verbal diarrhea
Again about baltimore: :D specially for you Mgbeks! WTH is up with this nonsense thing that baltimore dudes be having on their chin? 93% of all the black dudes are growing out this unkempt beard mess...like seriously can you maybe get a trim?..or shape it into something neat? it is so disgusting..at first i thought maybe it was just me being overly critical because well...i can be critical...but i've noticed it too many freaking times..it's like that skinny jeans business...can some one say TREND FAIL? EPIC TREND FAIL!! please cease and desist!!! JUST STOP!! EWWW!!
I feel so disconnected from life..I'm hoping to get back to normal soon..be able to watch TV and do blogrounds where i actually comment!!
Tunrayo...keep ya head up!
Oh...bloggers/ppl who just randomly read but dont blog...send a quick prayer up for ya girl this Friday anytime between 2-5pm. 'ppreciate ya.
K...time's up!! Peace
Then i remembered that I hadn't updated in a minute either...teehee! :D Well at least i'm not as bad as some other ppl that haven't updated in 6months (*ahem HauteFaces!! :p)
Not that I have much to update about..these days just seem to all roll into one another...and i do the exact same thing everyday...bleurgh!!...and I dont even get to watch TV.
So I've been praying for serious help..and God has been giving it...but I really need to work on the fact that I just might be really really xenophobic (with the foreigners being everyone that is not me..or related to me..or a friend)...end verbal diarrhea
Again about baltimore: :D specially for you Mgbeks! WTH is up with this nonsense thing that baltimore dudes be having on their chin? 93% of all the black dudes are growing out this unkempt beard mess...like seriously can you maybe get a trim?..or shape it into something neat? it is so disgusting..at first i thought maybe it was just me being overly critical because well...i can be critical...but i've noticed it too many freaking times..it's like that skinny jeans business...can some one say TREND FAIL? EPIC TREND FAIL!! please cease and desist!!! JUST STOP!! EWWW!!
I feel so disconnected from life..I'm hoping to get back to normal soon..be able to watch TV and do blogrounds where i actually comment!!
Tunrayo...keep ya head up!
Oh...bloggers/ppl who just randomly read but dont blog...send a quick prayer up for ya girl this Friday anytime between 2-5pm. 'ppreciate ya.
K...time's up!! Peace
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Random Thursdays
Hey Blogworld..how's it hanging?
So....did everyone else see that worldhiphop.com video of Maia Campbell from "In the House" with LLCoolJ fame? She looked like a straight up crackhead..like i watched all 10 minutes of it with my mouth hanging open...Bonus...Am i the only one who didn't know she was Bebe Moore Campell's..(author who wrote brothers and sisters) kid? Me i didnt know o!
Happy Birthday Taynement...make it a good one
Saw the "Strong Ting" video..hot look..i still dont get the concept. And if i catch anyone copying those dance moves in public..i will castrate them..:o...me i've said my own sha.
Um...one of my teachers is soooo cute! he's this little old argentinian guy with white hair and a comb over..he's alway so well dressed with his cute little brown shoes and get this..he smokes a PIPE he keeps it attached to his waist with another little pouch that i'm guessing is for the tobacco...hehee..if only his cute littleness would make his class/topic more interesting..blech!
I love Friends ..the show..always and forever
@ Nice Anon...I listened to those songs..i think i prefer the one with Kanye better...I also listened to Yori Yori...guess i have to be in the mood for that.
Kudos to Whitney Houston...i'm happy for her.
Life is just a mystery...I just have to believe that everything happens for a reason...and God knows the reason and He doesn't put on us more than we can bear. And life is only a preparation for eternity.
TV is my vice...i was soo much more productive when i didnt have a TV and cable and stuff..damnit it!
Why is Baltimore just THE HOOD? Like why? Why? Just why? Why do i see so many weirdos and crackheads and weirdos!! LIKE seriously?
I can't wait to watch the Princess and the Frog movie!!! Sooo excited.
Why do they show Sonic commercials when there is clearly no Sonic within a 200 mile radius of me? :( stupid commericals
Chicken and arthchoke soup is like..THE business!! just freaking yummy!! *rubs tummy*
K...that's all break's over..bye!!!
So....did everyone else see that worldhiphop.com video of Maia Campbell from "In the House" with LLCoolJ fame? She looked like a straight up crackhead..like i watched all 10 minutes of it with my mouth hanging open...Bonus...Am i the only one who didn't know she was Bebe Moore Campell's..(author who wrote brothers and sisters) kid? Me i didnt know o!
Happy Birthday Taynement...make it a good one
Saw the "Strong Ting" video..hot look..i still dont get the concept. And if i catch anyone copying those dance moves in public..i will castrate them..:o...me i've said my own sha.
Um...one of my teachers is soooo cute! he's this little old argentinian guy with white hair and a comb over..he's alway so well dressed with his cute little brown shoes and get this..he smokes a PIPE he keeps it attached to his waist with another little pouch that i'm guessing is for the tobacco...hehee..if only his cute littleness would make his class/topic more interesting..blech!
I love Friends ..the show..always and forever
@ Nice Anon...I listened to those songs..i think i prefer the one with Kanye better...I also listened to Yori Yori...guess i have to be in the mood for that.
Kudos to Whitney Houston...i'm happy for her.
Life is just a mystery...I just have to believe that everything happens for a reason...and God knows the reason and He doesn't put on us more than we can bear. And life is only a preparation for eternity.
TV is my vice...i was soo much more productive when i didnt have a TV and cable and stuff..damnit it!
Why is Baltimore just THE HOOD? Like why? Why? Just why? Why do i see so many weirdos and crackheads and weirdos!! LIKE seriously?
I can't wait to watch the Princess and the Frog movie!!! Sooo excited.
Why do they show Sonic commercials when there is clearly no Sonic within a 200 mile radius of me? :( stupid commericals
Chicken and arthchoke soup is like..THE business!! just freaking yummy!! *rubs tummy*
K...that's all break's over..bye!!!
Saturday, August 29, 2009
My take on Loving and Being In Love…
In response to MPB’s confusion
…………I’ma preface this by saying that this is one of those rare long posts that I sometimes question publishing because I feel like it’s preachy and who am I? and I know I haven’t made any concessions about other people’s perspectives on the matter but I’m gonna anyways because it’s my blog and I can :). Forgive grammatical errors!
You can be in love with someone and love the person at the same time. There will be cake and ice cream days when you feel like your love makes you superhuman and you can do any and everything. But there will also be broccoli and spinach days when you feel like everything is going wrong and you wonder if you made the right decision because surely “this is not love…I know how I feel when I love someone..I’m happy and they make me happy and I smile and the sun is bright, flowers bloom and birds chirp”. Maybe those broccoli and spinach days are when the true test of love happens..and you either bear down, hold your nose, deaden your taste buds or put some seasoned salt on it and force it down. Because while it doesn’t taste as good..it’s probably better for you..shows you what you are good at..and what you need to work on..and it helps you grow and hopefully grow stronger together.
I mean, where exactly is it written that loving someone and being in love with them are ALWAYS mutually exclusive? The whole “I’m in love with someone” feeling or maybe even just the realization of it à la Nice Anon..sometimes catches you unawares..sort of like being blindsided by an 18 wheeler. It crushes you..palms sweaty, shortness of breath, head rush, eyes unable to focus, lightheaded..it’s a very Eureka! moment. It’s even better when it’s reciprocated.
Falling in love is similar to the realization that you have fallen out of love with someone but it also includes nausea, disgust and extreme sadness, physical sickness..sometimes, the thought alone of having to face these horrible side effects makes most people stick it out to endure a long bitter life of regret, unhappiness and what ifs?.….some people don’t cheat at this stage..but some do; hoping to fill the emptiness that now resides inside after the eviction of love. Some people stay together for the kids..but even that love, while momentarily sustaining does not heal a decaying heart. There’s also denial..that sneaky little dirty thing!
Falling in love IS a choice..and so is falling out of love…they are both processes…not spontaneous but gradual..over time. If it is reciprocated, then maybe both parties can agree to work on it constantly so that they can STAY in love…regardless of how many broccoli and spinach days they encounter. I think that falling out love can be avoided if both are willing to do the work. And it is far easier to get a divorce, or break up than it is to do the work.
The only love that is constant and unfailing even at our most undeserving is God’s love for us.
Nerd epilogue: I spent the whole week being taught about how mathematics explains why physics is the basis of every process that occurs in chemistry and how chemical processes are what take place in biology..biology being the science of life. Eventhough they’ve figured all this out..and made up their laws..and all processes obey these laws, at no time did anyone explain to me how the same chemistry and biology that are responsible for putting cells together to form organs like the eyes that have the same function in all creatures with eyes..are responsible for putting together the brain which while it has the same function…almost always yields different personalities in billions of different people. Lol @ ppl always trying to explain away God..yet with every class all I am is progressively filled with awe at what MY GOD can do!
In response to MPB’s confusion
…………I’ma preface this by saying that this is one of those rare long posts that I sometimes question publishing because I feel like it’s preachy and who am I? and I know I haven’t made any concessions about other people’s perspectives on the matter but I’m gonna anyways because it’s my blog and I can :). Forgive grammatical errors!
You can be in love with someone and love the person at the same time. There will be cake and ice cream days when you feel like your love makes you superhuman and you can do any and everything. But there will also be broccoli and spinach days when you feel like everything is going wrong and you wonder if you made the right decision because surely “this is not love…I know how I feel when I love someone..I’m happy and they make me happy and I smile and the sun is bright, flowers bloom and birds chirp”. Maybe those broccoli and spinach days are when the true test of love happens..and you either bear down, hold your nose, deaden your taste buds or put some seasoned salt on it and force it down. Because while it doesn’t taste as good..it’s probably better for you..shows you what you are good at..and what you need to work on..and it helps you grow and hopefully grow stronger together.
aside: Facebook is such a double edged sword…it allows people to give others a snapshot into their lives..especially people in relationships and married couples with their “this is the rib of my rib and the bone of my bone” and ”my life is now complete because Chidubem has put me first” notes, pictures and such..so that me I’m here going “FML ! I must be doing something wrong in my life..why is no one trying to claim me as their rib?”…and forgetting that snapshots don’t always tell the story of what reality is…and how much work people have put into themselves and their relationships in order to make it work.
I mean, where exactly is it written that loving someone and being in love with them are ALWAYS mutually exclusive? The whole “I’m in love with someone” feeling or maybe even just the realization of it à la Nice Anon..sometimes catches you unawares..sort of like being blindsided by an 18 wheeler. It crushes you..palms sweaty, shortness of breath, head rush, eyes unable to focus, lightheaded..it’s a very Eureka! moment. It’s even better when it’s reciprocated.
Falling in love is similar to the realization that you have fallen out of love with someone but it also includes nausea, disgust and extreme sadness, physical sickness..sometimes, the thought alone of having to face these horrible side effects makes most people stick it out to endure a long bitter life of regret, unhappiness and what ifs?.….some people don’t cheat at this stage..but some do; hoping to fill the emptiness that now resides inside after the eviction of love. Some people stay together for the kids..but even that love, while momentarily sustaining does not heal a decaying heart. There’s also denial..that sneaky little dirty thing!
Falling in love IS a choice..and so is falling out of love…they are both processes…not spontaneous but gradual..over time. If it is reciprocated, then maybe both parties can agree to work on it constantly so that they can STAY in love…regardless of how many broccoli and spinach days they encounter. I think that falling out love can be avoided if both are willing to do the work. And it is far easier to get a divorce, or break up than it is to do the work.
The only love that is constant and unfailing even at our most undeserving is God’s love for us.
Nerd epilogue: I spent the whole week being taught about how mathematics explains why physics is the basis of every process that occurs in chemistry and how chemical processes are what take place in biology..biology being the science of life. Eventhough they’ve figured all this out..and made up their laws..and all processes obey these laws, at no time did anyone explain to me how the same chemistry and biology that are responsible for putting cells together to form organs like the eyes that have the same function in all creatures with eyes..are responsible for putting together the brain which while it has the same function…almost always yields different personalities in billions of different people. Lol @ ppl always trying to explain away God..yet with every class all I am is progressively filled with awe at what MY GOD can do!
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Music makes me lose control
I'm totally just bumming it...doing absolutely nothing and enjoying the crap out of it...
Jamming to my -badly-in-need-of-an-update-ipod. Men music is soo awesome!! D'y'all ever focus on certain parts of a song and play it over and over again cuz it's just sooo...touching? Not necessarily deep...sometimes it's cuz of the words..other times it's cuz of the artist's voice/delivery..for example
"I am a fighter..i ain't gon stop..there is no turning back..i've had enough!"--Christina Aguilera's "fighter"...am i the only one that develops just the most arrogant lil walk when i'm listening to this song? Yea..probably :) LMAO...ppl that see me probably be thinking..wtf is wrong with this chick?
"..are you waiting for a special occasion
to give me your heart
cuz i need a little confirmation
to make a real start!!...don't wait till it's too late"
....that's from Fefe Dobson "everything"
or
"...i have lost the dignity i had before
trying to pleeeeaassee everybody"--Lucky Dube "slave"..sad stuff..
or
"...it's a little too late for you to come back
say it's just a mistake think i'd forgive like that
if you thought i would wait for you..you thought wrong.."--Beyonce "if i were a boy"
or
"It's ooooooooover..it's ooooover...it's ovverr this time..it's ooooooover...it's oooooovvverrr"--Jesse McCCartney "it's over" as in how many times do I have to say it's over
and for the chops/delivery
Lady Gaga.."Just Dance" ...3:48-3:56 in the video on youtube..it's not overly showy or christina aguilera-ry but something about when she's screaming "Baybay....BAY....BAY..e..yeah!!" just makes me rewind that part over and over again
Jojo..."Too little too lat"..2:40 to 3:00..the song where she goes.."Yeeahhh...OH Lord (i think she says oh lord)...yeaahh yeah yeah yeah...wooo!..laaaayaaeete....yeah yeah...you just like the chase baybay!"
There's probably a lot more..but that's all i can think of..plus i'm getting distracted by the shuffle.. anyone out there care to share their favorite lyrics/delivery?
Jamming to my -badly-in-need-of-an-update-ipod. Men music is soo awesome!! D'y'all ever focus on certain parts of a song and play it over and over again cuz it's just sooo...touching? Not necessarily deep...sometimes it's cuz of the words..other times it's cuz of the artist's voice/delivery..for example
"I am a fighter..i ain't gon stop..there is no turning back..i've had enough!"--Christina Aguilera's "fighter"...am i the only one that develops just the most arrogant lil walk when i'm listening to this song? Yea..probably :) LMAO...ppl that see me probably be thinking..wtf is wrong with this chick?
"..are you waiting for a special occasion
to give me your heart
cuz i need a little confirmation
to make a real start!!...don't wait till it's too late"
....that's from Fefe Dobson "everything"
or
"...i have lost the dignity i had before
trying to pleeeeaassee everybody"--Lucky Dube "slave"..sad stuff..
or
"...it's a little too late for you to come back
say it's just a mistake think i'd forgive like that
if you thought i would wait for you..you thought wrong.."--Beyonce "if i were a boy"
or
"It's ooooooooover..it's ooooover...it's ovverr this time..it's ooooooover...it's oooooovvverrr"--Jesse McCCartney "it's over" as in how many times do I have to say it's over
and for the chops/delivery
Lady Gaga.."Just Dance" ...3:48-3:56 in the video on youtube..it's not overly showy or christina aguilera-ry but something about when she's screaming "Baybay....BAY....BAY..e..yeah!!" just makes me rewind that part over and over again
Jojo..."Too little too lat"..2:40 to 3:00..the song where she goes.."Yeeahhh...OH Lord (i think she says oh lord)...yeaahh yeah yeah yeah...wooo!..laaaayaaeete....yeah yeah...you just like the chase baybay!"
Sometimes...it's not even singing..it's rapping...One of my favorite rappers is Bun B..i think it's just a combination of his voice, how he delivers it and what he's saying... Personally..i think he upstaged Jay-Z on big pimping..then again i'm probably biased..
There's probably a lot more..but that's all i can think of..plus i'm getting distracted by the shuffle.. anyone out there care to share their favorite lyrics/delivery?
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