'Tis the season..

Hola mi amig(o)as,

What's the deal? It's snowing!!! 12 inches abi 14 inches! (That's what she said!:D lol)
I'm getting to that point where I realize that the year is over. Another year is over! and i try to take stock of where I was when the year started and where I am now. Hmmmm...:)
And regardless of what goal,dreams and wishes that were not accomplished,realized or granted...I thank God for being the one constant, unchanging factor in my life. Even when I stray..which I do a lot.

This is my first Christmas away from my family in 26 years..weird! SUPER WEIRD

I really dont have anything to say...but i figured since I ain't blogged in a while might as well say something...

So i found out that i have been completely dumb about reading the bible. I haven't read the whole bible but I also dont think I've read any book of the bible in context. It's horrible i know, but i figure better late than never. Normally, I read like a chapter right..based on a devotional and just lean on the devotional for interpretation, or try and figure it out as it applies to me. What I've been forgetting is that the books of the bible are actual BOOKS..with purposes, beginnings, middles and endings and if i start reading something from chapter 12 of course it won't make as much sense as from chapter 1. Blogville no yab me o! Mehn! I've been having some serious blond moments lately but God dey!

Off on a tangent, I'm so guilty of looking into ppls carts when i'm grocery shopping to see if they have something that i've never tried and might like....so in that spirit and in the spirit of Santa..here are a few things that I discovered this year and absolutely love!!
1.A Perfect World™ Antioxidant cleanser with White Tea..it smells soo good and works soo well. They claim it helps detoxify the skin and stuff.
2.Modern Friction™ Nature's gentle dermabrasion..i use this like once a week as an exfoliating scrub thingie. I only got it cuz I had a gift card and the lady did a demo on my hand it it felt amazing. Smells good too!

3.Victoria's Secret PINK® Supersoft Body Lotion Fresh & Clean: I just like it cuz it comes in a big-ish container and it smells good :D
4.Bath & Body Works® Signature Collection:Triple Moisture Shower Cream
Warm Vanilla Sugar®...smells like dessert!! :D
5.Really good for sealing in moisture especially this winter
6. Dior Addict 2: my fave..now empty..and NOBODY IN THE WORLD SEEMS TO HAVE IT anymore!! How rude!

How about youse guys? what are some things you absolutely love and can't do without? Share..maybe i might like it too.

What turns me on...

.............
ok fine you got me!! there is nothing remotely sexy about this post..it essentially degenerated into a random-type post during the week. I'm sorry *hangs head in shame* I have lured you here under false pretenses.. however since ya already here..might as well read innit? :D

1. For the past two days..I have had garri and ogbonno soup for breakfast :D. Repping that true naija girlness!! I don't know why, that just seems to be all i crave in the morning..I'm talking 8am! and it actually keeps me for a while seeing as i don't get to eat lunch anytime before 3. And it's yummay!!

2. The only reason why the aforementioned breakfast of champions sucked was because I had a session with my tutor *blushes* and I already think he's pretty cute and such a freaking nice guy..and me without gum or mouthwash. Damn...

3. I was half scared that he would think i was just the dumbest person on the face of the earth..like i was so frazzled i didn't know what element "I" was (it's iodine btw). And i never said chemistry was my favoritest subject. Anyway...he was cool and i understand stuff so much better now!

4. I found out he was my tutor on like Tuesday and I was gushing about it to my friend who says "I don't understand how you can get turned on by brain"..(insert your dirty joke here..c'mon you know you want to)...
i digress...anyway..i was like..in my mind.."what else IS there?". I mean looks will fade and money really just doesn't do it for me but the two things that turn me on are a sense of humor and smarts (both of which my boo got plenty of..but this is not about him). I mean if this dude was tall to boot...i would be a puddle of just teenage girl crush gushiness!! Alas..he has a very lucky girlfriend. BOOOO!!!
HIISSSS!!

5. In true random fashion..if i could be any element, I'd want to be Helium :D no reason in particular

6. So I'm bummed!! just found out that the person i wanted to do my next rotation with can't take me, for a bunch of very valid reasons but that doesn't mean that i can't still pout about :( so that's what i'm doing! POUT POUT POUT!!!!

7. So i watched New Moon with Eggs...:) and um i don't think I'm going to see anymore of the saga..the acting was just too freaking corny for my taste..my imagination was way better!!

8. I was listening to Rhianna "rehab" the other day and damn that girl CANNOT sing!! I think what had saved her so far was the the songs were catchy..but enh..her new stuff is just crap!! BOOO! to you Rhianna!

9. I saw Kelly Clarkson's video for "gone" or "already gone"..the new one and I'd heard the song and liked it..i just like it all over again. It's sad really..the song is about loving someone and having to let go or something like that..i forgot..but it reminded me of the Nick Lachey song that goes
"we built it up to watch it fall, like it meant nothing at all..i gave and gave the best of me..couldn't give you want you need..blah blah blah...I can't hate you anymore"
And i just decided that love is complicated oh. T'aint easy!

10. My nephew says my name!!! lol..he says Hi Kate!! it's so cute! I miss him. wish i could visit for keresimesi but na money kill am :(

11. I was talking to someone about free-spirited, go-where-the wind blows and I just realized that I don't think I've ever not made a planned out decision (I know man proposes and God disposes) but...i don't think I've ever been able to not try to plan things out just the way i think it could work or should be. I've always had plan B's i think. I guess the only non plan B type decision people like me get to make are regarding love and marriage

12. So i'm on this new quest to grow my hair since i had braids in it for *ahem months and i thought it would all fall off but it didnt..so naturally i googled how to make hair grow..and i'm a believer. I dont even want long long hair sef..cuz i think i have pretty ok..medium length thick hair..i just want to see how long it can get. I mean it's pretty logical..my hair grows but it breaks off cuz i dont take proper care of it..so what will happen if i DO take care of it? Stay tuned! My hair idol is this chick...she's cute too... i just want hair that long..no mas!

It's the weekend y'all..it's supposed to snow..plus i have hella catching up to do! i think i might make a nice winter soup or chili for the week. Stay warm and things!!

@Taynement..get a snuggie!!acting like she ain't got ppl on her list waiting for a call that she can holla at! smh *rolls eyes*
No my spellchecker did NOT just spell check my Rhianna!! whatevs!!

Random...or not so random

Arrrggghhhh...i just wasted a perfect opportunity to tell somebody off even though i was well within my rights to do so and it is pinching me badly!

I suck at keeping in touch but I definitely crave about 6 or 7 tete-a-tetes soon.

I just realized that I do not like rejection..i mean nobody does but yeah..me NO LIKEY.

I'm not ready for a new week...short or not

In this moment I am happy and I feel lucky and i think that's the annoying part is that i'm like if only you knew how I felt...you'd just back the hell off and support me...but you dont..or you dont care

Men it's so foggy out

So i used to be this big ol' ball of emotions, mostly anger/indignation but I think i've calmed down a lot..i still get emotional about injustice,ignorance and just plain stupidity tho...you'd never know it huh? :D

I know I'm biased...and like with Keanu Reeves i have decided that M.I is my one and only favorite nigerian rapper..there is no swaying my vote..except maybe for jesse jagz but even he has to take a backseat to my M.I 99% of the time

I realized on friday that i do not have the stomach for research involving live animals...even mice..it's just so sad..like can you imagine breading thousands of mice only to kill them for research that might not amount to anything? What if someone did that to humans? So not cool!

I tried to make ogbono soup this weekend...it came out as soup..but not the type of ogbono that i'm used to. I know! I know! Shame on me! Help/recipes/video tutorials followed by shipment of samples for taste testing would be appreciated from my correct naija chikitos! Thank ya!

Peace,Love and have wonderful week!

You Just Know

I have had numerous conversations with friends and family about this whole "you just know stuff" that married ppl be saying after they get married or when they are engaged.

It's almost like marriage is some exclusive cult that brainwashes ppl into that mindset of "we didn't go through any drama, when our eyes met across the crowded room, time stopped, the heavens opened up and we JUST knew that we were meant for each other".

No offense to my married ppl..and I'm sure that there are ppl out there who knew from day 1 and are still happily ever aftering but some "Just Knewers" have to account for the 50% divorce rate in this country and the growing divorce rate in Nigeria..abi?

It actually sort of insults my intelligence when people say that but i think maybe it's that same protein that makes mothers forget what they go through for 9 months and during labor so that they can keep reproducing that makes married couples forget all the fights/make ups and break ups and drama that paved their road to happily ever after.

So here is my take..once again not backed by any proof (as per the brainwashing thing) but feel free non-married and married ppl to throw in your 2 cents..tell me if I'm just bsing. :)

FIRST OF ALL!!! YOU DON'T JUST KNOW...you know ENOUGH
....you know enough to want to stick around and find out where things may lead
....you know enough about yourself to know if the relationship is what you want and the flaws are what you can handle
....you know enough about your partner to know that hopefully, they feel the same way too
....you know enough (if you are spiritual/religious)to know that God definitely has to be involved for it to work
....you know enough to accept that it won't always be cake and cookies but are willing to stick it through the hard times and work things out
....you know enough to know when what you know is not enough..

This is why I believe there is no set TIME to get married, societal pressure and sales rack propaganda be damned. Because if you know that you don't know enough and you too you go jump the broom, better make sure you are spiritual because only God will see you through that relationship...and it just might work.

So why then you ask is this "You just know" idea still being propagated?
Maybe it makes ppl feel better/more certain about their choice..it's a big choice and self-affirmation has been shown to work wonders...who knows.
My prayer for everyone is that they don't "Just Know"...they know "Enough". Just knowing could someday lead to not knowing while knowing enough concedes that you don't know everything.
I know enough to know that I don't know everything and I never will but I think as I've grown up and come to accept this fact,I'm content enough with my lack of knowledge to know when i know enough.

Again no offense to my married ppl o. I love you guys and you serve as huge sources of inspiration for the likes of me!! :)
I was gonna post this on FB..but em..fear con catch me small as i reread am!! Not trynna incur anyone's wrath for speaking my mind albeit Obama 'O8 and junk!! Freedom of speech or no! :)

ps. I was reading RepOne's post about soulmates and I had a response but then i forgot it... let me unclutter my brain from all this learning crap and then it's on and popping!

pps: y'all know the deal...prayers for ya girl tomorrow 2-5pm..it's worked so far, surely it must continue to work! Amen 'Preciates!

ppps: try pink lemonade plus fruit punch plus mountain dew in equal quantities with a hint of ice...magical!!

pppps: Hi Tayney!!!:)

In hibernation

Hi y'all
I'm commenting on all blogs in spirit
@MPB...i see ya!! LOL..and you are entirely too old to be clubbing..so um please stop
@Tayney: nice randoms...

Ermn...oh yeah
Happy Birthday to the woman who gave me life!! LOVE YOU MOMMY!!!always and forever!!!

So..I'm studying/watching MTV and stuff
I suck at returning phone calls

Back to MTV
based on their appearance on TV
Justin bobby type men are very rampant i think...and sooo annoying!! like ENOUGH with the head games..grow the hell up and stop being such an ass!!
Spencer..lmao...only Heidi's can handle
Poor Audrina....
um...wow...
Women are smarter than all this bullshit aren't we?
But damn our forgiving, nurturing hearts..always willing to give second and seven hundredth chances...ok maybe not all women
It's also scripted and makes for good tv so who knows what goes on when he cameras go off.

New Victoria secret bra instantly adds 2 bra sizes? WHAT? Mgbeks head of the IBTC better get on that o!! I'm copping me two as we speak!!

God forgive me but my whiny roommate just whined my name and i once again pretended that i was listening to something when i'm actually not so that i dont have to hear her whine about the same thing that me i'm studying for.lol

Ugh my hair!! I need dominicans!! soon please!!! somewhere..i'm so tempted to venture towards the hood to see what i can find!

Soooooo..... powdered flax seeds + oatmeal+peak milk + splenda = Omazing!!!

Dear Jon of Jon and Kate plus 8,
if i never heard anything about you in the next second..it would be toooooooo freaking soon..please drop off the face of the earth soon.

Judge Judy is soooo funny i love her

Why didnt anyone tell me how good jerk chicken is?..I had this amazing sandwich and i've been thinking about it since

I admit that..sigh...i'm now on board the indomie train!! yes 50 years later..them things are the ish..with some sardines!!! who knew..i'm still trying to get mines up to par with the master tho!! :)

I want Kristin to show that Justin Bobby boy pepper!!

lol..sorry...mismash at it's best!!
toodles!!

Je vis pour Vendredi!!

Yayyy it's friday!!!

and Yay!!! I'm a good mood because God is wonderful and faithful and even though my mustard seed faith wavers...He's still faithful. I'm sure He must shake his head at me when I'm being chicken little!

Today is my dad's birthday!...yay!! My dad is awesome and I love him and the sacrifices that he and my momma made for their kids!! I just hope I make them proud! :)

So..yesterday/this week i was all ready to blog about my version of evolution (cuz i don't believe in the current version) and how it applies to interracial dating and marriage..but then SOMEONE!!! told me that I'd gone off the deep end with my stereotypes cuz I've been in isolation...I still think i have something sha..but let me sleep on that a little bit.

I've realized...even though i thought i knew this a while back..than music just makes me happy. I used to love studying to music but then i was scared that i wouldn't be able to remember stuff on exams cuz i wouldn't be allowed to have headphones on..but I can't just not listen to music all together..so now i just listen when I'm walking.
Top 10 on steady repeat (yes they are all old)
1. MI - illegal music - track 2-- the one that goes "i can paint a picture with a pen"
2. MI - illegal music - Gbono fe li freestyle...i love MI!!
3. Lady Gaga - Just Dance...that's the only Lady Gaga song i have on my ipod but it puts me in such a good mood..i ALWAYS dance..regardless of where I am.
4. Good girls go bad! - Starship cobra
5. Superhuman - Chris Brown f. Keri Hilson
6. Maino - All the above
7. Ego- Beyonce...i dunno..i get in these beyonce moods..I'm so going to learn that dance..just cuz i wanna
8. Nickelback - I'd come for you
9. Buy you a drink -the remix with Trey Songz...
10. Redeemer - Nicole C. Mullen...i love the part where she says "Because He lives I can face tomorrow"
Redeemer

Heb. goel; i.e., one charged with the duty of restoring the rights of another and avenging his wrongs (Lev. 25:48, 49; Num. 5:8; Ruth 4:1; Job 19:25; Ps. 19:14; 78:35, etc.). This title is peculiarly applied to Christ. He redeems us from all evil by the payment of a ransom (q.v.). (See REDEMPTION.)
deep stuvvs!

11. Use somebody-Kings of Leon..but it's not on my ipod
@Mgbeks..i was gonna comment on ya blog about the whole running thing..I dunno about no marathon status type running yet (been scared ever since some 23yr old collapsed and later died running the Baltimore marathon) but...i would love to run the 5k someday. There's this couch to 5k running training type thing that I've been doing..it helps you stay fit and it trains you to pace yourself while running..you should checkirrout if you are interested. Ahem..I'm on week 3..I've been on week 3 for like 2 weeks *blush* don't judge me!! this girl is busy and thangs!!

Errrmmm......hmmm...it's getting cold!! soooo not cool.
Enjoy the weekend folks...stay warm

Standing Up for what you believe in...

Shall we address why i'm still up at freaking 2:27am even though I have class tomorrow and was twenty minutes late to class yesterday cuz i slept late? Let's not!

Ok...so...CBS has the monopoly on the best reality shows - Amazing Race, Big Brother and Survivor.

I'm not going to go into details but I just watched 3 episodes of Survivor ONDEMAND and can I just say it revived my dwindling hope for black America?
This random dude Ben was calling this black chick Jasmine ghetto trash cuz she was accusing him of bodyslamming her in a challenge. Ben (a bar manager) later called her a bitch and said that she should go eat ketchup sandwiches and drink koolaid.
Enter our hero Jaison...at first i thought he was a proper naija boy..but then he spoke and i was like..."awww man..nah he ain't but he's still cute tho..sans the two toned southern exposure"....

All this while...*Ben and Jaison are on the same team...Jasmine is on the other team..she was visiting their camp for the day*
All this while, Jaison was just quiet, observing..and I'm like "ok i know this is a game..but can my black man please stand up for me?"...(well not me but you get).
So sha...that episode goes by and Ben is still there..Jaison still aint said jack.
Next episode...Ben is even more obnoxious and annoying..or maybe i just really dont like the guy more...and Jaison is like.."dude made some racial comments"..."dude's gotta go!!"
Errbody else including Russell (who is another case) was like "nah men..let's take out a girl and leave him for next time".Jaison is like..."dude's gotta go!"
So they all go to tribal council where they vote...and after some back and forth between Ben and Jaison...Jaison finally gives this speech..speech to rival any and all of Obama and MLK's speeches put together (ok...i'm exaggerating). But seriously...it brought tears to my eyes. I said a special prayer for his parents for raising him right!
He said:

"I just have to draw a line in the sand. And I have to say that there is no 1 million dollars that is worth me sitting up with him anymore. I mean, I sat here and watched him scream at Yasmin at our camp, and over here, saying incredible things. So is there a way to patch this rift? I don't think so. But I'm not going to sit in camp and listen to this guy. I'm just not.You should have some sensitivity to history. And historically when certain comments are made and directed toward certain people it is because of race. If what you're telling me what you said had no racial context, then maybe what Yasmin said is right and you are ignorant.”- Jaison

*guess her name is Yasmin not Jasmine :D

Chineke!! I wanted to applaud!! I was filled with this renewed sense of hope..and pride. That's what we need. More men to stand up for what they believe in. Was Yasmin wrong?..ABSOFREAKINGLUTELY....but that is not the point..let her wallow in her own ignorance. Years from now she will look back and regret her actions..but Jaison never ever will.

So even if RIP Black in America is right and the Jaisons of the world will go on to marry white women..while the Yasmins of the world stay picking no good men and being loud and nonsubmissive...that's ok too. Maybe it's natural selection..cuz i know that regardless of who Jaison marries (as I book my UHAUL to relocate to chitown)..he will instill in his progeny that idea of believing in something and standing up for it!! I hope. In short Jaison is on my prayer list!

About Jaison...Jaison Robinson is a 28 year old law student from Chicago. Undergrad from Stanford. US National Water Polo team :), Loves physical activities *ahem*...plays the piano and the cello...uh...did i mention he was named Mr Califorina by Cosmo in 2006? Oh i didnt? Did i mention that i was relocating to the Chi? LOL!! Trynna find a cuter picture than what's on CBS.com

Life...Love and the Pursuit of Happiness..

So this post from taynementy got me thinking before..then i put my thoughts on hold until today... These are not long thoughts...just semi-complete..sometimes incomplete sentences..about those three things in the title....

On Life..so the big deal in school today is about one of the 2009 Nobel Laureates for Medicine and Physiology..Carol Greider . They discovered the enzyme telomerase and i had typed stuff about it but it somehow got deleted and i dont feel like typing it again...it has something to do with cancer and aging...
you know who might have waaay more telomerase than normal people? George Hamilton..like this dude doesn't seem to age!! Has anyone sequenced his DNA? he could be the source of several cures..i tell you..look at his pictures from the '50's, 80's and today...this dude is 70!...then again maybe it's the tanning...and the botox..but even before botox men...!

Anyhoo...Greider is like 48 now with a husband and 2 kids......they made this discovery when she was 23 and in her first year of grad. school....So when i heard..my first reaction was like...good for her..followed closely by a second which was...um..yo girl is 3 years late on the Nobel-worthy discovery tip..but i have twenty two years before i hit that 48 mark!

And then i thought...I mean i would like my work to be meaningful and helpful to mankind..but seriously that's not what gets me up in the morning..I just really want to do the best I can in that one day and make it through the day onto the next. And i want to love what i do. So I'm praying for God's vision and wisdom on that...maybe if i didn't watch so much TV..I'd have more time for other stuff :D

On Love..went to a friend's wedding this past whirlwind weekend..and it was nice catching up with the peeps...and chilling with my neph!!!Every time i see him i want to relocate so i can see him everyday! :( He's barrels of fun!!! Sha sha...the wedding was interesting. The bride was beautiful..her wedding dress was gorgy!! The only lil damper was a lil speech given about the cake before the "first feeding" and how it was supposed to be bringing us...uncouth lil folks a slice of culture by including a leaf covered statue of the Eiffel Tower...end verbal diarrhea....Oh yes! yo girl caught the bouquet!!! LMAO...teeeheee....it was quite comical really...especially when my mom came over to hug me like i had accomplished some feat..when nobody else really wanted to catch it...single ladies be fronting sha!! Moms followed it up by asking me when i was getting married...to which i promptly replied:"two years"...:D. Trust my pops to act like nothing happened!

Sooooo not the point of this paragraph sha.....point was...I know we are all at that age and everythang where...our career goals might be looking like it's getting somewhere...and we are done partying and bs-ing...and therefore...feel the need to jump the broom...but my prayer is that everyone who wants to get married finds the right person to jump the right broom with..not cuz it's the "logical" next step but because that's who they want to spend their happily ever after with. Amen

On the pursuit of happiness...you know what makes me happy? ..every morning at 7am...my alarm is set to 860AM radio..so i wake up to Dr. Robert Cook's "walk with the King"...i thought it was just a 15 minute morning devotional..but apparently I've been missing like 40 minutes of it! Ha!..anyway..i think those last 15 minutes are when he summarizes. I love it because it just puts me in the right mind frame for the day. Instead of rushing to get ready like my roommate (who i beat to class everyday anyway!!)...i get those 15 minutes to relax and reflect on the blessings of the day before and the challenges of the day...

My neph..makes me happy...

My friends and family being healthy and happy makes me happy...

Resto makes me happy...

School....ha! not so much...but life after school definitely makes me happy...

erm...glad to see that some ppl had nice weekends..thanks for the prayers on Friday....I'm sure they were answered.

@Myne..thanks for visiting and commenting!!!

mini rant!!....Guys..you might think you don't have an expiration date..but y'all do...looking like old uncles at the club...if you like don't go settle down and find a wife...when younger girls see you what they're really thinking is "EWWWW..why is this old guy who looks like my uncle trying to holla". And for the love of 1997...please stop posing with fake gang signs and the peace sign..maybe it's just me but the hell!!...stop it!! guys and girls...stop it now!

Now that i have properly wasted 2 hours of my life typing and browsing...i must now go do what I'm supposed to be doing. And i was looking forward to watching Mulan today! :(

Tumbleweed....Echo...Hellooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!

Soooooo..I was about to throw a temper tantrum complete with rolling on the floor, kicking and screaming because ppl have not been updating their blogs!! I mean what the H? Like..i need time wasting things to do but every time i go the blogs..i've already read the most recent update!!
Then i remembered that I hadn't updated in a minute either...teehee! :D Well at least i'm not as bad as some other ppl that haven't updated in 6months (*ahem HauteFaces!! :p)

Not that I have much to update about..these days just seem to all roll into one another...and i do the exact same thing everyday...bleurgh!!...and I dont even get to watch TV.

So I've been praying for serious help..and God has been giving it...but I really need to work on the fact that I just might be really really xenophobic (with the foreigners being everyone that is not me..or related to me..or a friend)...end verbal diarrhea

Again about baltimore: :D specially for you Mgbeks! WTH is up with this nonsense thing that baltimore dudes be having on their chin? 93% of all the black dudes are growing out this unkempt beard mess...like seriously can you maybe get a trim?..or shape it into something neat? it is so disgusting..at first i thought maybe it was just me being overly critical because well...i can be critical...but i've noticed it too many freaking times..it's like that skinny jeans business...can some one say TREND FAIL? EPIC TREND FAIL!! please cease and desist!!! JUST STOP!! EWWW!!

I feel so disconnected from life..I'm hoping to get back to normal soon..be able to watch TV and do blogrounds where i actually comment!!

Tunrayo...keep ya head up!


Oh...bloggers/ppl who just randomly read but dont blog...send a quick prayer up for ya girl this Friday anytime between 2-5pm. 'ppreciate ya.

K...time's up!! Peace

Random Thursdays

Hey Blogworld..how's it hanging?

So....did everyone else see that worldhiphop.com video of Maia Campbell from "In the House" with LLCoolJ fame? She looked like a straight up crackhead..like i watched all 10 minutes of it with my mouth hanging open...Bonus...Am i the only one who didn't know she was Bebe Moore Campell's..(author who wrote brothers and sisters) kid? Me i didnt know o!

Happy Birthday Taynement...make it a good one

Saw the "Strong Ting" video..hot look..i still dont get the concept. And if i catch anyone copying those dance moves in public..i will castrate them..:o...me i've said my own sha.

Um...one of my teachers is soooo cute! he's this little old argentinian guy with white hair and a comb over..he's alway so well dressed with his cute little brown shoes and get this..he smokes a PIPE he keeps it attached to his waist with another little pouch that i'm guessing is for the tobacco...hehee..if only his cute littleness would make his class/topic more interesting..blech!

I love Friends ..the show..always and forever

@ Nice Anon...I listened to those songs..i think i prefer the one with Kanye better...I also listened to Yori Yori...guess i have to be in the mood for that.

Kudos to Whitney Houston...i'm happy for her.

Life is just a mystery...I just have to believe that everything happens for a reason...and God knows the reason and He doesn't put on us more than we can bear. And life is only a preparation for eternity.

TV is my vice...i was soo much more productive when i didnt have a TV and cable and stuff..damnit it!

Why is Baltimore just THE HOOD? Like why? Why? Just why? Why do i see so many weirdos and crackheads and weirdos!! LIKE seriously?

I can't wait to watch the Princess and the Frog movie!!! Sooo excited.

Why do they show Sonic commercials when there is clearly no Sonic within a 200 mile radius of me? :( stupid commericals

Chicken and arthchoke soup is like..THE business!! just freaking yummy!! *rubs tummy*



K...that's all break's over..bye!!!

My take on Loving and Being In Love…
In response to MPB’s confusion
…………I’ma preface this by saying that this is one of those rare long posts that I sometimes question publishing because I feel like it’s preachy and who am I? and I know I haven’t made any concessions about other people’s perspectives on the matter but I’m gonna anyways because it’s my blog and I can :). Forgive grammatical errors!


You can be in love with someone and love the person at the same time. There will be cake and ice cream days when you feel like your love makes you superhuman and you can do any and everything. But there will also be broccoli and spinach days when you feel like everything is going wrong and you wonder if you made the right decision because surely “this is not love…I know how I feel when I love someone..I’m happy and they make me happy and I smile and the sun is bright, flowers bloom and birds chirp”. Maybe those broccoli and spinach days are when the true test of love happens..and you either bear down, hold your nose, deaden your taste buds or put some seasoned salt on it and force it down. Because while it doesn’t taste as good..it’s probably better for you..shows you what you are good at..and what you need to work on..and it helps you grow and hopefully grow stronger together.

aside: Facebook is such a double edged sword…it allows people to give others a snapshot into their lives..especially people in relationships and married couples with their “this is the rib of my rib and the bone of my bone” and ”my life is now complete because Chidubem has put me first” notes, pictures and such..so that me I’m here going “FML ! I must be doing something wrong in my life..why is no one trying to claim me as their rib?”…and forgetting that snapshots don’t always tell the story of what reality is…and how much work people have put into themselves and their relationships in order to make it work.

I mean, where exactly is it written that loving someone and being in love with them are ALWAYS mutually exclusive? The whole “I’m in love with someone” feeling or maybe even just the realization of it à la Nice Anon..sometimes catches you unawares..sort of like being blindsided by an 18 wheeler. It crushes you..palms sweaty, shortness of breath, head rush, eyes unable to focus, lightheaded..it’s a very Eureka! moment. It’s even better when it’s reciprocated.


Falling in love is similar to the realization that you have fallen out of love with someone but it also includes nausea, disgust and extreme sadness, physical sickness..sometimes, the thought alone of having to face these horrible side effects makes most people stick it out to endure a long bitter life of regret, unhappiness and what ifs?.….some people don’t cheat at this stage..but some do; hoping to fill the emptiness that now resides inside after the eviction of love. Some people stay together for the kids..but even that love, while momentarily sustaining does not heal a decaying heart. There’s also denial..that sneaky little dirty thing!


Falling in love IS a choice..and so is falling out of love…they are both processes…not spontaneous but gradual..over time. If it is reciprocated, then maybe both parties can agree to work on it constantly so that they can STAY in love…regardless of how many broccoli and spinach days they encounter. I think that falling out love can be avoided if both are willing to do the work. And it is far easier to get a divorce, or break up than it is to do the work.


The only love that is constant and unfailing even at our most undeserving is God’s love for us.


Nerd epilogue: I spent the whole week being taught about how mathematics explains why physics is the basis of every process that occurs in chemistry and how chemical processes are what take place in biology..biology being the science of life. Eventhough they’ve figured all this out..and made up their laws..and all processes obey these laws, at no time did anyone explain to me how the same chemistry and biology that are responsible for putting cells together to form organs like the eyes that have the same function in all creatures with eyes..are responsible for putting together the brain which while it has the same function…almost always yields different personalities in billions of different people. Lol @ ppl always trying to explain away God..yet with every class all I am is progressively filled with awe at what MY GOD can do!

Music makes me lose control

I'm totally just bumming it...doing absolutely nothing and enjoying the crap out of it...


Jamming to my -badly-in-need-of-an-update-ipod. Men music is soo awesome!! D'y'all ever focus on certain parts of a song and play it over and over again cuz it's just sooo...touching? Not necessarily deep...sometimes it's cuz of the words..other times it's cuz of the artist's voice/delivery..for example

"I am a fighter..i ain't gon stop..there is no turning back..i've had enough!"--Christina Aguilera's "fighter"...am i the only one that develops just the most arrogant lil walk when i'm listening to this song? Yea..probably :) LMAO...ppl that see me probably be thinking..wtf is wrong with this chick?


"..are you waiting for a special occasion

to give me your heart

cuz i need a little confirmation

to make a real start!!...don't wait till it's too late"

....that's from Fefe Dobson "everything"


or

"...i have lost the dignity i had before

trying to pleeeeaassee everybody"--Lucky Dube "slave"..sad stuff..


or


"...it's a little too late for you to come back

say it's just a mistake think i'd forgive like that

if you thought i would wait for you..you thought wrong.."--Beyonce "if i were a boy"


or


"It's ooooooooover..it's ooooover...it's ovverr this time..it's ooooooover...it's oooooovvverrr"--Jesse McCCartney "it's over" as in how many times do I have to say it's over


and for the chops/delivery


Lady Gaga.."Just Dance" ...3:48-3:56 in the video on youtube..it's not overly showy or christina aguilera-ry but something about when she's screaming "Baybay....BAY....BAY..e..yeah!!" just makes me rewind that part over and over again


Jojo..."Too little too lat"..2:40 to 3:00..the song where she goes.."Yeeahhh...OH Lord (i think she says oh lord)...yeaahh yeah yeah yeah...wooo!..laaaayaaeete....yeah yeah...you just like the chase baybay!"

Sometimes...it's not even singing..it's rapping...One of my favorite rappers is Bun B..i think it's just a combination of his voice, how he delivers it and what he's saying... Personally..i think he upstaged Jay-Z on big pimping..then again i'm probably biased..

There's probably a lot more..but that's all i can think of..plus i'm getting distracted by the shuffle.. anyone out there care to share their favorite lyrics/delivery?

Open Letter Version 2.0

Dear DirectTV...
Everyday is for the thief and one day is for the owner. I own you son!!! Haha...um..my bad i got carried away. Anyway..see me see trouble o, I signed up for directv when i moved to a new place because they were offering lots of orisirisi...6 months of HBO, 3 months of showtime, $200 jetblue gift card, DVR..all for a pretty good deal..or so i thought. All i had to do was sign up for 1 year of service right? So why after my 1 year contract was up did i try to cancel only to find out that while my service contract was for 1 year..the contract with a DVR is 2 years?
Chineke! I'm stuck..to cancel is $280 and i refuse to pay that on principle..I was duped! hoodwinked! Bamboozled! NO FAIR.
Sooo..i called my new place and asked if i was allowed to have a dish and they said no...it's a safety hazard. So what did i do? I called Directv and scheduled a free move..with 3 months of showtime and starz included!
Ol' installation dude shows up and is not allowed to set up..so he calls me
Ol' : hi, you know you're not allowed to have directv in this apartment right?
Me: Huh? No..what do you mean? I can't talk right now..i'm moving!
Ol':well you need to call directv blah blah blah
Me: I can't talk right now..have them call me
So they call me and I pretty much play dumb again.

This story is getting long sha...basic gist..i call them back two days later..they finally agree that there's no "line of sight" so even if i wanted to get dish..i can't. Through no fault of my own.:innocent face:.so my contract has to be cancelled and I dont have to pay no stinking $280. Boooyah!!

Dear Houston,TX.
Why you gotta be so damn hot? From the moment i stepped off the plane..all i wanted was a strawberry slush and a cold cold shower!! WHY? JUST FREAKING WHY? NO air!! Men...however...I did/am having a fabulous time chilling with the neph! he is the cutest thing since ever..he used to have a fauxhawk but he cut it all off now he has this grown man look to him. He's soooo smart too..and he has rhythm.

Dear *bad* lacefront wig houston,tx wearers..(emphasis on bad because not all of them are bad),
Yes..nobody died and made me fashion god...me sef i'm a fashion victim most of the time but damn!! I mean if you're going to have that thing on your head...at least put some effort into making it look..i'm not even going to say real..because..c'mon.. PRESENTABLE. I just weak! Take a class..do something! PLEASE...AND THANK YOU!. Then again..it's probably just me being a weirdo..so carry on.

Dear fake ass mothersuckers in houston,tx..,
you know yourself and i wish i could expose your multiple wife having, system duping, every opportunity to lick ass having selves because i have absolutely zero respect for you. Ppl that you'd never see or associate with all of a sudden showing up at your house because they want to be seen/rub elbows with "influential" ppl..and you are eating the food i lovingly prepared for family and friends..c'mon TA! gbafuo ndi nzuzu!

Um....I've been so out of the blog world loop..i will try to make my rounds when i return back to the real world.

Deuces!

Up..Up..and Awake!

Urrgghh! don't you just hate when you take long naps during the day and end up waking up at like 9pm and not being able to go back to sleep? Suckity sucks sucks! Thank God it's saturday sha..cuz this wouldn't fly tomorrow o!
So..what does one do when they can't go to sleep? Why blog of course... what to blog about..hmmmnn..*obviously my lazy ass didn't finish this blog till just now..God please help me and my procrastinating ways!7/27*
On the NaS and Kelis thing...BUAHAHAHA...you know..i find it hard to feel sorry for NaS. I mean it's not like Kelis is some gold digging moocher..she actually had a career. But she's never come off as the most stable person ever. Everything could've probably been settled all nicely out of court..maybe he wouldn't have had to end up paying this crazy $55k or whatever..but nooooo!! ppl be doing stronghead..oya now..go pay! You sef you didnt know who you married. Shebi you are God's son..hope you still talk to Him because uh...you're gon need some help with that buddy! *don't know the full story/ details*
So now dudes are getting all upset and crying foul and unfair...DING!DING!DING! fools! since when has the justice system ever been fair talk less of life? :hahaha: PAY SUCKER PAY!!!

On Ryan Gosling..has anyone else noticed how swaggerliciously sexy his walk is? That boy is just all kinds of sexy..in every single movie!..Yum-o! Rachel McAdams is a hottie too! I covet her body. YES i'm watching The Notebook for the 6th time..it's on tv. It's not one of those movies i can watch over and over again..i just watch it cuz the sex scene was hot. :blush:..don't side eye me!! Old age sha...James Garner used to be a hottie back in the day...not as hot as my Paul Newman tho..but aight none the less.

On Marriage..so my buddy just got engaged. Young boy like this! I'm happy for them. So you know how when ppl get engaged you ask them "How did you know she was the one?"..but as per my dude..I've seen and heard all about his conquests and although I've never met her...there's obviously something about her that got him. Is he a different person or has he changed? Nah..i dont think so. I don't think he's settling down because of age or whatever..I think he finally realizes that he's found his better half..abi soulmate so why wait? cute stuff huh?

On Black in America Deux..i totally didnt watch it! *hangs head in shame* but i'm sure i'll catch it sooner or later. But i read (read: skimmed)..an article by Africangal on CNN reporters at large..I think. Where she talked about her experiences and how she feels more comfortable around Africans than African Americans. Ya know..i understood where she was coming from. For the longest time (read: till like last year)I really didn't associate much with African Americans mainly because I had really bad experiences with classmates in high school. And I can't honestly say that if i wasn't thrown into a situation where the only ppl my age in my hood were african american..I still wouldn't have any african american friends..it's funny because one day we were having a conversation..about something and i was adamant about not being called african american. My roommate was like
AA#1 : You're african american..our ancestors are from the same place
Me: Um..probably not..my ancestors never made it onto the boat
AA#1 and AA#2: give each other a look..
WHAT? it's true..obviously my ancestors never made it onto the boat.

It's just really interesting how different my two african american friends are sha..
AA#1 has natural hair, plans to get locks once she's established in her career..is all about black ppl..all their names in their family are apparently afrocentric..only dates black people..went to Spelman..refused to go see Jesus Christ Superstar with me because the guy portraying Judas was black..EVEN THOUGH IT WAS THE ORIGINAL guy that played JESUS that was playing JESUS AGAIN!! GOSH..i still dont get that.

AA#2 gets her biweekly blowouts and perms..is about ppl in general..has the whitest name ever..dates whoever..also went to a HBCU but she did that because she'd gone to all white schools all her life.

But I digress.... the point i was trying to make was "once bitten twice shy"..if i hadn't been put in this situation, I'd have probably never been close friends with any african americans based on my experiences in high school. But I'm glad I was because their friendships have been invaluable.

On my baby turning 1..I can't believe this..my sweetheart..my boojoogooboojoo! My lil nephew is turning one. He's so adorable and i'm upset that i don't get to spend enough time with him. I miss him all the time. I recycle because of him, I'm deeper into my research because of him..I would give my right arm, kidney, lungs, liver, heart..whatever for him. Happy Birthday Googoo!! This aunty right here loves you!!

F.I.V.E that spells 5..credit report.com baby :)

..shut up...that's how the song goes!!:)

5 things that I would like to do:
1. Take a vacay and do absolutely nothing..
2. Join a dance group..i be choreographing stuff in my head..but when i try it out..it never looks the same..prolly cuz i also envision me as Ciara doing the dances in my head..hmmm that could be the problem
3. Be actively involved in a church..not just sunday sunday medicine
4. Write a book...actually wrote one with my best friend like 14 years ago..geez! i'm old..
5. Visit Europe

5 things that I look forward to:
1. Dessert :D: I'm a chocolate junkie!
2. Summer blockbuster movies
3. Going home after work to watch "Bones": this is a new development
4. Starting a new adventure in a new city!!
5. The next 4.0-infinity years :)

5 things that I’d grab if my apartment caught fire:
1. I guess my cellphone..NO IT'S NOT A BLACKBERRY!! hmmpfff..
2. My laptop
3. My Passport
4. My ipod
5. My purse

5 random things about me:
1. I hate getting in the shower after ppl...ugh..it's all wet and stuff
2. I can usually memorize 85% of a song after hearing it once
3. I love moving..like the whole packing and unpacking process...
4. I'm the funniest person in my family..honest!! so much so that i usually have to copyright my jokes so that my sisters don't take credit for them when they are retelling them later on..they still usually do..monkeys!!
5. I love coming into work every morning...sometimes i dance in to work... :)


5 things that I’m wearing right now:
1. glasses
2. jeans
3. purple tank top
4. brown sweater
5. matching underwear (ha! take that taynement..elevate ya skivvies! )

Psycho-ness or Puppy love?

So..i've decided to type this whole story in pidgin because some ppl be doubting my skills... i also had two drinks soooo....woooohooooo i feel good!

Anway..so i get this intern..make we call am Blessing. Blessing na proper fine babe and her personality dey shine well well. So..for this summer, she con finish first semester for school early, con start 'in internship but she con be the only ghel wey dey work with plenty plenty intern bobos. So..una know say at this age (na 1st and 2nd year college most of the pikins bin dey finish) ..bobos them get hormones plenty. Con dey dey interested in this my intern because she tall well well, con slender like this..con get personality and i don talk before sey she be fine girl.

Everyday when we dey for work..na so bobos dey con find am..girl go dey sit jejely dey do 'in work na so bobos dey enter for my lab as if na market i dey..dey con disturb the girl..dey siddon dey watch am type. This don they hapun sotey..e get this one boy..make we call am Jason.. Jason be proper shy guy..I mean, the bobo fine and 'in play football for high school but 'in claim sey he no too get friend for high school. That tori sef dey do me one kind because everybody sabi sey football jock for high school dem famous and dem get plenty plenty groupies..i sha leave that side.

So Blessing con take it upon herself con say..make i befriend this boy because 'in want befriend boy make 'in get friends wey be boy but no be in boyfriend boyfriend like that (naive sontin like this!). Na so before you go fit shout jack robinson..bobo con develop feelings for the girl..con invite her to dey hangout. Blessing dey do like pesin wey dey brighteyed and bushytailed..con dey talk say "we're just friends..we can hangout" . Na so bobo take am for dinner..con say..make we go back to my place go watch moofie. Blessing no know sey dis na ambush. Bobo con introduce Blessing to all 'in family.

Make we fast forward two weeks..Blessing go vacation come back. Jason con ask am sey make she comeover so that 'in go make am dinner. At this point..she too con dey think sey bobo no bad..and we con dey hail the guy small small for 'in eye. So Blessing go the bobo house. Bobo con cook am dinner..con light candle..con give am wine (i don't condone underage drinking). After dinner, they con siddon for living room..con dey cuddle..bobo con talk say "Blessing..you be correct babe..everytime i see you my heart dey do me *giddygo-giddygo*..me i like you well well o..you fine, you smart, you get personality wey dey nice"... Blessing con give the guy kiss..

Na so katakata con burst...bobo wey dey enter my lab 3 times a day before now con dey enter 12 times con dey siddon dey do Blessing work. Meanwhile..Blessing come work tell us say she don 4cup because 'in make mistake when 'in kiss bobo. She talk say bobo dey smother am. So she text the bobo and 'in text talk say "I dey very sorry..I no mean give you wrong impression when i kiss you...na situation..make we no do boyfriend and girlfriend again..make we just try to remain friends"

Bobo con vexxxxxxx...con send her 17 texts while she dey work..dey talk say
"Blessing..you no fit understand wetin i dey feel, I bin tink say you care about me...me i care about you well well..but you con hurt my feelings..why you tink sey things no go work...abi you tink sey because you go leave after summer go school e no go fit work?"
"Baybe girl make you at least give am chance..it fit work..this ting wey we get dey very beautiful..i never feel this way about anoda girl before..wetin change between when we dey my house and i dey hold you as you dey look into my eyes and today? Why you dey do me like this?"
All this after one kiss and two dates in two weeks o!!
So the girl con respond con write"i dey very sorry..but i no want again..i just want make i focus on this internship we dey do then i go go back to school..you be nice boy..but i no do again..i just want to be friends"

Bobo no dey come our lab anymore..for one whole week, then yesterday na in bobo con send am email con talk say make them talk face to face..

Na in I come fear..because if after only 2 weeks the bobo dey act like this..me i think say this no be normal young boy thing..this na psycho stuvvs...if una talk say bobo don make shrine for this girl..con dey save strands of the girl hair dey use am chop 'in morning cereal me i go believe o!!
So we advice the girl say make she talk to the bobo..but make she talk to am in public. She con gree...

So today..they go talk for atrium..bobo con talk say in dey sorry for overreacting..that na because of the feelings wey he get for the girl na 'in cause am to behave like that. The girl con say.."it's alright..i dey sorry too..but maybe we suppose take some time before we go try to be friends sef"
the bobo con talk say 'in no like that but e go respect im wishes... but make 'in suggest that make them no just be friend..'in no want put label on the thing but 'in want for them to be more than friends.
Blessing con talk sey " i no dey do wishywashy stuvvs..na only definite stuvvs..and i only wan do definite just friendship with you".....
na so we see am o my people..
Me i talk sey this boy dey just a little bit too psycho...others dey talk say na puppy love. Wetin una think?

:D How was my pidgin?

See me see trouble o!

So in the summer of '05..i worked at a boy's and girls club summer camp with a bunch of bad ass kids.. I just found this ahem..email correspondence with one of my students...

Young Boywrote:Mrs. Kate i know you are 22 years old but you are very pretty and i know i am very young but age is not nothing but a number
Me: Mrs. would imply that i was married, which i'm not. Thanks for the compliment :) age aint nothing but a number but 16 is a really small number
Young Boywrote: so what you trying to say that i am very young i know that so how many times you going to throw that in my face. Ps.Where (s'posed to be we're) on the internet so i cant get in trouble for what i say on here so tell me what is on your mind.
Me: nothing is on my mind....um and yeah u can't get in trouble period....i can

see me see trouble..boy trynna make me look like a pedophile and ish!! I only got his email address because I offered to help them with any homework problems they might have... :o.

Anyhoo..just a random flashback
what's hood ppl?

Open Letter

Dear VH1,
How’s tricks? Good..good. Say..did humanity as a whole do something to offend you in your past life? Don’t get me wrong, I mean at first..it was all fun and games..Flavor of Love was comical…as was Celebrity Fit Club. I admit that I also watched the Surreal Life and My Fair Brady. BUT..VH1…you’ve gone too far. TOO FAR SHEY YOU’VE HEARD? In less than 10 years..you have managed to generate so many craptacular shows that have skyrocketed people to stardom who have no business being anywhere near a camera and people who left to their own devices would probably be in charge of the fry station at What-A-Burger (don’t get me wrong..ain’t nothing wrong with honest work). When pray tell..is all this foolishness going to stop? I’ll even give you For the Love of RayJ because Danger smashing the homies was funny but you should be shot for all the I Love Money seasons..as well as letting this fool! (below) ever get 1..talk less of 4 shows. Who pitches this stuff? Who accepts it? All involved parties need to be shot!
Rock of Love 1 &2? Daisy of Love? Charm School 1 &2? Brooke Knows Best? Breaking Bonaduce? (ok..that was a pretty sad show sha)…Miss Rap Supreme..with Kaia (seriously wth was that about?..and the one eyed chick?!)..Gotti’s way? I Want to Work for Diddy? Scott Baio is 45 and single..and 46 and pregnant? OMG Real Chance of Love?

Seriously..somebody needs to talk to you guys about this nonsense..this ish has to stop. And you have the guts to claim you are trying to Save the Music? Meanwhile I have to suffer through the same 3 recycled music videos every freaking morning. Y’all ain’t trynna save no damn music..you’re busy auditioning those kids for your next generation of 15 minute entertainment cash cows and to fill up your future shows. Your new craziness is Megan wants a millionare..and you have now inspired BET to just sign up every baby mama and reformed crackhead off the street for their own shows.. I mean heck..I could get my own freaking show!! Me & the Carnies taking up residence in the open field next to my apartment...it would be a hit!!! :o.



VH1...please..sometime in the near future..you gotta stop. Let scripted reality finally rest peacefully in it's grave.



Dear John Gosselin,
Let’s skip the formalities shall we? I understand that life is not always easy. And that things don’t normally go the way we plan. I even understand that you sorry excuse for a father…who at 22 decided along with yer crazy bride that it was OK for you to have in vitro fertilization..are human after all. However..explain this to me ok..explain to me why after citing being followed 24/7 as the partial cause of the demise of your marriage you decide that the next logical is to carry you and your doobie smoking homewrecker of a girlfriend to paris to pose for pictures? Shouldn’t you be in the nearest rabbit hole hiding out away from the press for all eternity? I hope Kate jacks you for every single Audigier cent you get you spineless loser!!! Ode mumu!!!

Ooooh..yeah, i wish you happy birthday..ooooh yea..very many many happy returns :)

To the person who has been responsible for:
- 55% of my smiles
- 70% of my laughs
- 40% of my motivation
And who has 100% of my heart..100% of the time
Amazing,supportive,caring,brilliant,kind,loving,thoughtful,sexy,intriguing, funny,i nspiring, special, talented, always-in-my corner, everything I ever thought I wanted and needed…through everything..I wouldn’t change anything because I cannot...will not imagine being on this journey with anyone else.
As you begin another year…may your life be continually enriched with all the joys and successes and accomplishments that you deserve. May God continue to pour out all His love and wisdom and blessings upon you!!! Know that for every second of the next 365 days till forever that you are loved!! Happy birthday babe!! Muah!!

Unwritten

Aight...guys and girls of blogworld
We all know that there are unwritten rules about dates exes friends.
Stemming from another conversation I had with my girl..she was so nice as to list which of her exes I had permission to date and which ones I didn't..lol..how nice of her.

Girl Rule states: Under no circumstances are my friends ( friends ranging from my best friend from the womb to the lady i gave gum to on the bus that one time) allowed to even sniff in the general direction of not just someone i dated but anyone that i have a crush on.

Guy Rule states: I would appreciate a heads up from my friends if they are interested in my ex..but only exes that i was really serious about..i think..correct me if I'm wrong.

I guess my issues with either version of the code is this:
Ladies...
1. What if this your friend and your ex are meant to be..like soul mates etc etc? Eventually you're either going to have to deal with it or remain bitter about it and that doesn't do anybody..especially you any good.
2. What if the dude is seriously like actively pursuing you and disregarding the obvious unwritten code? Actively as in constantly calling and all up in your grill..and the attraction is mutual....What do you do?
3. Is there an expiration date on this you can't date my ex ish? Like what if you are happily married with 3 kids..can your friend date your ex now? I mean you've obviously found your own soulmate
4. Say you "come to terms with it eventually" would you show up at their wedding? be Godmother?
Fellas..
1. Why does it appear to be easier for guys to let go/grant permission?
2. Does this mean y'all are less attached to exes than girls? Or maybe less territorial?
3. Why would you actively pursue your ex's bff even after you know about the unwritten rule?

All:
Has anyone ever found themselves in this situation? If yes..would you admit to have been kinda scoping out the friend b4 you and your girl/you and your guy broke up?

Personally sha, I've never consciously put myself in any of these situations. Whether I've unconciously landed into a similar situation is a story for another day :)

Just Ranting

I know facebook is the new marketplace/venue for expression and I admit that i've been on both sides of the fence with these MJ status updates. On one hand i'm like ok this is incessant but on the other ..all the negative comments and ppl complaining about ppl making a big deal and about other ppls comments just freaking pissed me off.
I'm like YOU WISH THAT IN YOUR LIFETIME YOU ACCOMPLISHED AN OUNCE OF WHAT THIS MAN ACCOMPLISHED IN 50 yrs. You wish that in your lifetime you made such and impact on so many ppl in so many different places. How about you try effecting some change in the world instead of coming up in hear criticizing ppl trying to pay tribute to Michael. WE LOVE HIM..we appreciate his impact as a musician, acknowledge the problems he had..and celebrate him as a humanitarian..so kindly back off!!!
Before it was "cool" for celebrities to be humanitarians...Michael been don did it.
No other artist..EVER..in the history of the world..has sold as many records as he has.
And i'm totally speculating and I hope i'm wrong..but if his kids are not his biologically then all that talent, that heart, that everything has been totally wiped off the face of the earth...never replicated..Michael Jackson...the legend..is extinct. But that's ok because his imprint will be on this earth forever.

I honestly did have more rants..but i'm watching this Michael Jackson memorial and i think i've finally accepted that he's gone. Wow.
From nothing....FROM NOTHING!!! to the legend.

My name is Kate...and i confess

..that while i find it repulsive to walk past a guy and look back and catch him staring after me..i find it mildly "ego-reducing" when i walk past a guy and i turn around to catch him NOT staring!!

..that..(piggy backing on the 1st one)...it really is much less repulsive if the dude looks like say Idris Elba vs. if he has a six-headed bald head like neyo and a body like Kevin James.

..that while i'm an independent woman *car i'm driving..i bought it, rock i'm rocking i bought it..house i live in i rented it* and stuff, I find it extremely sexy when I don't have to bring out my wallet to pay for stuff that i want but don't need when i'm out and about with my boobookins.

..that once again..while i can pay for my own drink and stuvvs...really fellas? You cannot expect to sit beside me and "conversate" with me without at least OFFERING to buy me a drink. 50% of the time i'll probably say no sha.

..that as enlightened and "secure" as i feel, I still check out chicks and compare especially physical attributes. I mean yeah your boobs are bigger than mine and you got a lil more booty than i do and stuff...or you are so freaking gorgeous and we thank God for you but damn..throw me a bone. Can i get you to develop a flaw?....halitosis? shemale? dumb as rocks? can't cook? farts in sleep? something!! :o

..that as much as it is not in my nature to be the jealous type in relationships..i slip up sometimes. This probably goes hand in hand with me being territorial.

..that..I LOVE...love LOVE kids.. and i was thinking about it this past weekend when i was chilling with a bunch of cuties..I'm ready to have kids. I mean my current situation might not allow it but mentally I think i'm there..eek!!

...that as much as i hate smelling cigarette smoke..(and this is probably gross)...i love the smell of alcohol mixed with cigarette smoke on guys' breaths.. eww right? Dunno..some ppl like the smell of toe jam..i like that smell..sue me.

...that while I accept that change is good and change is inevitable...i sometimes get gripped by these little mini panic attacks about this next stage in my life coming up.

...that ok i admit, i'm not the world's best dancer but I can hold my own on the dance floor..with white folks..in this rinky dink town..where no one really dances..and our "club" is inside a Holiday Inn....sooo i kinda don't want to be knocked off my throne as self proclaimed best dancing queen but i'm sure that i will be when i move! hmmpfffh!

...that i really have a problem with guys calling women bitches..or hoes..but i still listen to some songs that do..and i'm not really a feminist by any stretch of the imagination. Don't have a problem with girls calling other girls bitches or hoes tho..hmmm...

...that's all folks!!

Right to be wrong...

See me see trouble o blogville..

aight so..for one reason or another I seem to have lost touch with my exes..but I also just happen to still be friends with their friends...weird stuff

And one said friend just informed me that my ex (first boyfriend) got engaged to his girlfriend...i think they've been dating for about 5 years..so i guess she was his girlfriend after me.
Now..we broke up for several reasons some of which i'm not proud ..like HWNSNBM, it was long distance..i was young and i was in college so i was broke too.. in a year or a year and a half i only saw him like three times. I also did not see myself getting married to him..these are my reasons for ending the relationship. The defense rests.

Anyway sha..i digressed..point was i had this conversation with the friend

Him: Xyz is engaged...he proposed to his girl
Me: oh for real? I didnt know sha..
Him: what do you mean you didnt know? It's all over facebook
Me: I'm not facebook friends with either one of 'em
Him: wow Kate..you just amaze me
Me: wth?..what did i do?..i don't talk to either one of them..haven't for at least 2 years
Him: but you guys used to be in love
Kate: *rolls eyes*..."see excuses above...i mean i loved the guy...i know i wasn't in LOVE with the guy..I was 18..gimme a break"
Him: even if..my point is you guys cared about each other..my ex just had a baby and i hadn't spoken to her in years but i called her and said congratulations
Kate: ok..that's you, and you dated that chick for like 4 years...i just don't think that me saying anything adds or takes away from their happiness it hasn't for 5 years why should it now?..especially when they didnt tell me about it. That chapter in both our lives has been long closed and done with..

But seriously tho..am i in the wrong? Some ppl agree with me..and I dont think I should say anything..it doesn't remove anything from my life..but it doesn't add anything either. I mean yeah...good for them, if i see them i'll say congrats but I'm not sure that I want to go out of my way to say something to either one of them.

Randomizing

“…to a man whose music, talent, genius, and grace entertained us, comforted us, and lifted our spirits time and time again. His sounds: the soundtrack of generations. Sometimes his talent and successes made him appear more than mortal – but death snaps us back to the stark reality. You’ll be missed, Michael. Thank you for a lifetime of selflessness, and a message of hope and healing to our world.. Thank you, Michael. Rest in peace…”--borrowed

Can I confess that I wasn't the biggest Michael Jackson fan? I mean i loved his music but compared to some of my friends and even my youngest sister...i barely scratched the surface. I never really followed any of the controversy surrounding him and any new weird thing he did i normally just chalked it up to him being eccentric. He is a legend..and he will be missed..

I've purposely not watched the news much or listened to the radio or mtv because i know it's all MJ stuff. I want to keep my memory the way it is.

I never finished that "Don't sweat the small stuff" book..it just got sappier and sappier. I try to read it from time to time tho

I'm trying to hook up my intern with this other cute german intern who as it turns out..also thinks she's cute..but now he knows that i know that he thinks she's cute..and obviously i told her..crap i shouldn't have told her...so me introducing them would just be weird.... screw it..i'll just introduce them *update...i just introduced them...and it was pretty awkward..but being the bubbly person she is..she was able to make it work*

So...did you know that drinking water is good for you because it helps your kidney perform it's duties of flushing out urea abi uric acid and allows your liver to do it's job of breaking down fat and getting rid of toxins as well? I didn't

I feel slightly stressed...but i'm trying not to sweat the small stuff...so stress?? what stress?

I love my intern...she keeps me young. She's such an awesome young lady.

I hate Nigerian english!!! ARRGGGHHHH it is so annoying..in the time you type "wunda"..you coulda typed "wonder" or "bn" ..."BEEN" "dese" .."THESE"

These last days are like playing chess..i stay trying to predict our opponents moves before they make 'em

These ppl don messed up our team..it's like distintegrating a team the season after they make it to the finals and expecting the same results the next year.

I like how you try to help me de-stress by cracking jokes.

I miss my paul....needs to hurry up and come back jare!

I cant wait to fall in love..with you..you can't wait to fall in love..with me..this just can't be summer love.
I have to be like the laziest blogger ever...ever...

Vamos a tequila, senorita, bonita
I really need it now
I aint got no tengo dinero, camarero
Say can we work it out

It's summer...and it's beautiful out...have good weekends ppl!

Personality Type a la Dr. Fisher

Found this on someone's blog..looked interesting..decided to take it
I think it's pretty accurate...kinda funny..and interesting..lol!!

Kate..., you are an

You are very curious and you love adventure, either or both intellectual and physical. So when you get interested in something, you can become extremely focused on it, sometimes to the exclusion of all around you. You pursue your interests thoroughly, too, often with originality and exactitude.You are adaptable, competitive and a problem-solver, as well as skeptical, tough minded and determined. Because you have a lot of energy and tend to be enthusiastic about your theories and projects, you can be very persuasive. You are eager to make an impact on those around you, too, as well as in the wider world.You are irreverent and highly independent. So you can be oblivious to authority figures, as well as to rules, schedules and social customs. And although you enjoy people and can be charming and humorous, you are not interested in routine social engagements or anyone whom you regard as boring. Instead, you seek stimulating and focused conversations; and you are comfortable being by yourself, pursuing your own many interests.Of all twelve (primary/secondary) types, you are also the most sexual-because both dopamine and testosterone stimulate the sex drive.*woohooo JACKPOT*!!

· Novelty seeking
· Impulsive and spontaneous
· Curious
· Creative
· Flexible
· Open-minded
· Energetic

· Decisive
· Focused
· Analytical
· Logical
· Competitive
· Self disciplined
· Independent

As an Explorer, you look out not in; you are foremost interested in the world around you. So you are attracted to a mate who is also intellectually and physically adventurous and interested in dissecting this complex, tangible universe. You particularly like imaginative and theoretical people, a "mind mate." And you like a partner who is sexual, because you regard sex as an important aspect of a relationship. You have nerves of steel and thrive on the edge. You are also decisive and direct. So you are unconsciously drawn to those who can balance out your highly independent and tough-minded spirit--those who are novelty seeking, yet compassionate, verbal, intuitive, trusting, flexible and emotionally expressive. hmmm...i dunno i'm undecided bout this

You like to have good conversations on important topics; so people tend to admire you for your knowledge and innovativeness. You shy away from emotional or self-revealing conversations, however; introspection leaves you cold. Instead, you derive intimacy from doing things with friends or a partner. So you make an exciting, although at times aloof, companion.

· You can be highly emotionally contained, even pretending that you are fine when you are in deep psychological or physical pain.
· You become impatient with cautious people or wordy conversations.
· You can become so wrapped up in your own interests that you spend too little time with your partner.

You tend to naturally gravitate to EXPLORER/negotiators.

fun
energy
adventure
new
active
passion
outgoing
traveling
spontaneity/spontaneous
ambition/ambitious
real

geek
debate
challenge/challenging
politics
nerd/nerdy
intellectual
intelligent/intelligence
driven